Mumbo Jumbo

I had a realization this past week. Not quite an epiphany, because that would imply some sort of world-altering, revolutionary shift in perspective, and that would be a bit of an overstatement.

No, my realization had more to do with the overall state of things in Corporate America. It was what you might call a Dilbert(TM) Moment. I was in a meeting with a client, and I stood up and said the following:

"YOUR CRM NEEDS TO BE IN SYNC WITH YOUR ENTERPRISE API SO THAT YOUR MISSION-CRITICAL APPLICATION METRICS ARE ON BOARD TO MAXIMIZE YOUR ROI AND INCREASE SHAREHOLDER VALUE."

Everyone in the room seemed to understand this. They all nodded in approval, and we all shook hands. I had no idea what the hell I'd just said, but whatever it was, either it made complete sense to all those present or they were each too terrified of being the only one to not understand it, and so they all pretended.

On Monday I will send them an invoice. I am certain they will pay it.

So...what was my realization, you might ask? Indeed, I will tell you.
To quote a Tom McRae song, "Falling feels like flying...until you hit the ground."

We're all on a great big airplane, and the pilots are monkeys throwing shit at each other while we gradually run out of fuel.

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