Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Nukyuhler Whack-a-Mole

I love the headline:

NORTH KOREA THREATENS NUCLEAR WAR OVER SANCTIONS

Um, OK.
I mean, we know the guy is crazy, but war with WHOM? even their buddy China is against them in this. Are they gonna take on the entire world?

Their first obvious target would be Seoul, yes? Or maybe somewhere in Japan. Surely that would be terrible, BUT within minutes the entire country of North Korea would cease to exist. All they would have to do would be to use nukes ANYWHERE and that would be sufficient to evoke a response that would be overwhelming. There would be a big, smoking, radioactive crater where the North used to be. And NOBODY would even protest, aside from maybe that smirking Kenny-Loggins-looking motherfucker in Iran -- but at that point he should be shaking in his boots because once his pals in NK put the nuclear option back on the table, it becomes not so Unthinkable to use it again, at least for the right-wing hawk types.

So...if it's posturing, it's not going to be very effective. And if it's serious, it will be suicide for that nutjob bouffant-haired midget and his starving subjects, yes? But the biggest worry here is that once we break the ice and use nukes, what then? Once the hawks get proof that nuclear war IS winnable, at least when it's so overwhelmingly one-sided, and when you combine that with the whole preemptive strike doctrine that has served us so well in Iraq (har dee har), how much of a stretch will it be to drop a few missiles on Tehran? Especially when we could have Israel be the bad cop and do it FOR us, and then back them up if they need it?

Our conventional forces are evidently stretched to the breaking point, or so I keep hearing -- which is of course what all the wannabe-boogeymen like Chavez and Kim Il Monkeyboy are counting on with their plastic sabre-rattling. But once somebody ELSE uses the dreaded nukes, suddenly we are King of the Mountain again, because who's got more nukes and better delivery systems than we do?

Of course, this plays right into the hands of the drooling hawks with their fingers on the big red button in anticipation, because what easier solution to everything can there be than to simply unleash 'The Unthinkable' on anybody who gives us grief? Hell, we can reduce a whole bunch of the world to an unlivable wasteland and still go in there with protective suits to drill for oil.

We just need to make it 'thinkable' again.
And, thanks to Kim Il Hairdo (or BadMood Ahmadinejihad), Hawks Incorporated may get their wish.

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